Go Where No One Can Hear Me
by Lady Seraphina Lightwood
Summary: From a young age, life was never anything but hell for her. Until she saw his smile. Companion to When It Rains.
1. Chapter 1

**Go Where No One Can Hear Me**

**[A/N]: This is the backstory of my OC from **_**When It Rains. **_**You'll see recognizable characters soon.**

**This will skip around somewhat in her life, maybe even from age fifteen to three. You'll see.**

**In this one, she is five years old.**

**Chapter 1**

At first glance, the child was perfect. Lovely pale skin, red hair, and blue eyes surrounded by thick black lashes. She had a clear little voice almost like wind chimes. She was sweet and well-mannered, an angel for all intents and purposes.

But those who knew the child – well, most of them – had long since found that under this, she was also clever, rebellious, and knew exactly how to get what she wanted from any adult.

Yes, they often said to each other, little Seraphina Lightwood will be a piece of work when she grows up.

And they were right.

Even as they spoke about her, she was doing things a little lady shouldn't have been doing, at least in good Narnian society.

Five years old, Seraphina Lightwood raced over to the tree with the boys, and hoisting her satin skirts up, began to climb. She just knew she could climb better than the boys, much faster. Especially faster than that annoying Cicero. That slow poke never had any fun and he was always reading, much to her boredom. Why was he even climbing today?

"_Seraphina, _get _down!"_

Startled, she almost lost her grip on the tree branch. Looking down, she met the worried eyes of her mother.

"No!" was her defiant response, and she began to climb again, trying to hurry and catch up with the boys.

"Seraphina, you must get down before you fall." Idella tried to reason with her stubborn child. "It is not proper for a young lady to do that anyway." She gave a despairing glance at Seraphina's skirts, hoisted high above her knees for climbing room, and the hem hopelessly dirtied.

But the girl was no longer listening, nearly to the uppermost branches. Now Idella could hear grumbles of disapproval from both humans and Animals among the adults. Her cheeks reddened.

"You will get down this instant. I am going to count to five and you will be out of the tree."

Seraphina's eyes widened, knowing her mother meant what she said at this point.

"One…"

She scurried to get down, scrambling for a handhold.

"Two…"

Down a few feet, and…

"Three…"

The child leapt from the tree.

"Ow!" she cried resentfully, staring ruefully at the ground. "That hurt!"

"And what did you expect, Seraphina, jumping down five feet like that?" Idella hurried over. "Are you hurt, sweetheart?" She passed her hands over her daughter, looking for injuries.

"No." She squirmed away from Idella's touch, wriggling out of reach, only to find herself face to face with that annoying Cicero. He had his book in his hand, of course, had probably been going to read it. Instead, he offered her his hand.

"Do you want to go play?" He smiled hesitantly.

Seraphina didn't know about that. But at a reproving glance from her mother, she nodded and took his hand, pulling herself up.

"Okay."

**[A/N] Cicero is very intelligent and mature for his age. He has a more important role in her life, though right now he is just 'that annoying Cicero.' He's seven, two years older than Seraphina.**


	2. Chapter 2

**[A/N] This chapter spans three years in just a couple paragraphs. **

**Note: **

**Disclaimer: Cadfael and Selene are characters from LadyAlambiel's fanfiction. They are being used with her permission.**

**The Narnian calendar belongs to Elecktrum, and is being used with her permission.**

**Thanks to both LadyAlambiel and Elecktrum. You should go read both of their stories, as they're both brilliant writers. If you haven't read them, what are you doing over here?**

* * *

**Chapter 2**

**12 Sunbend, 891-8 Stormfall, 894**

At some point, Cicero had become Seraphina's best friend. He was actually her only good friend – the only one Idella and Devlin approved of.

Idella seemed to be fond of warning, at least since Seraphina had turned eight, that those other children would only lead to trouble. Like most children, the little girl held no interest in her mother's teachings and would merrily run off to play with them again, dragging Cicero with her.

At age nine, she met Idella's friend, Selene, and Selene's husband Cadfael. They were both Centaurs, and Cadfael was _tall. _Seraphina barely came up to his knee. For her, his height was incredibly daunting, but he had a kindness in his voice and face that helped to rid her of the initial fright.

And it didn't take long for her to become attached to the lieutenant. Before a month had passed, she and Cicero – though Idella suspected Cicero's attachment was more to Seraphina than Cadfael – were following him everywhere they could, even to the castle for his duties there, asking endless questions. Selene and Idella found it most amusing, while Devlin shook his head and muttered about the audacity of small children.

And at last, just after Seraphina had turned ten years old, came a fateful day that changed her outlook on all of life.

The day did start out innocently enough. Cadfael and Selene were at the Lightwood's house with their three day old son, Oreius, and Cadfael was proudly showing him off to Idella and Devlin.

Seraphina looked on solemnly. Normally Devlin would have sent she and Cicero off by now, with a gruff order to go play, but Cicero was not there – where _was_ he? – and so Idella insisted that she was old enough to remain in the room with the adults.

So she sat in the little rocking chair in the corner, thinking about stupid Centaur colts who took his parent's attention away from her. She'd wanted to show Cadfael the new move her swordmaster had taught her, but no chance of that now…

She heard a snarl. A snapping; crunching; a mighty groan; and then the huge thud of something striking the ground. Seraphina leapt up to peer out the window, aware of the adult's wondering eyes.

Idella's tree lay on the ground.

There was a Wolf outside, standing with a Minotaur. A dark centaur.

And then Seraphina found her voice to scream. She wasn't stupid – she knew what happened with the felling of a dryad's tree.

"_No! Mother!"_

She ran to Idella's side, embraced her. Idella herself wore an expression of openmouthed shock and clear pain. Then, within seconds, she was gone from her daughter's hold, blown away like leaves on the wind.

Devlin made a guttural sound of fury and grabbed for his sword. Selene's hands were on Seraphina's shoulders, turning her, trying to pull her close, and Seraphina was weeping, lost and confused. She could not believe Idella was gone, because her mother was like a goddess, she was strong and perfect, invincible, so how could Idella Lightwood possibly die?

"No! Devlin, you must think of your daughter!" she dimly heard Cadfael calling, and he was out the door after her father while Selene pressed Seraphina against her and would not let her watch. She tried to comfort both Oreius and Seraphina, only half-succeeding.

Terrible sounds came from outside, and the only words Seraphina knew to describe them were

_Blood_

_Death_

_Father _

_Fear_

And she sobbed anew, because Cadfael came back inside and her father was not with him.

Idella and Devlin Lightwood were both dead in minutes.

* * *

**[A/N] In case of confusion, the disjointed wording and format of the second half was because of the haziness in Seraphina's mind as she recalls this memory.**


End file.
